Hate

Why do I feel like I hate everyone today? I started off good: working out. Then once the shitty tips came rolling in I began to hate on the world. I just tried calling Jen 30 minutes ago and left an embarrassingly long voice message. Now I hate myself! New rule: no v
..... okay, I just accidentally deleted half of this post. Anyway, I was just saying that I finally realized how crucial it is that I cut Tracy off completely. She's so pathetic and sad and, yes, I do care about her and I feel bad for her. But what can I do for her? Nothing. Now I need to figure out a way to give her keys to her roommate while she's at work. This is so dumb. Blogging. It's like one long embarrassing voice mail. Or text message. Or note. Whatever. I just want to make-out with someone. I want someone to be interested in me. To compliment me. To flirt with me. Despite my recent attitude about dating, I think I want to meet someone. I want that newness. A new person to kiss. That rush. New lips. New tits. I want that intense stare. Of course, most people would say that it sounds like I just want to use someone for sex. Maybe I do. Just not my ex-girlfriend (anymore). Do I really hate? No. I just have that disgruntled, get-out-of-my-face feeling today. I can't believe people thought that lead was good. The guy basically read from the book for 20 minutes and had a big head. God, what if someone I knew read this and figured out that it's me. Talk about awkward.